End of The Year

I swear a real post will come at some point, but I needed something easy right now, so here is an end-of-the-year survey. I did it last year as well.

This is mostly real-life-hannah, if you're curious about her, but there's a lot of writing in here as well.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before?

Wrote a fantasy manuscript--three of them, in fact. Took control of my health. Was single for the first time since I was 15, which *felt* like something I'd never done before. Wrote and sold two MG books. Wrote 4 books in a year, which I think is a record for me. Made new friends, which honestly feels like a new thing.

But all in all, not enough.

2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I kept almost all of them, actually, and I have already made mine for 2011. Largely writing-related.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Yes.

5. What countries did you visit?

I visited absolutely no countries, but I did go to the West Coast for the first time, and I'm leaving for Spain in a few days.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010.

A new book on the shelves, obviously.

A new person.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I honestly can't think of a single one.

Pathetic.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Selling Zombie Tag and the other MG. And, honestly? Writing my magic gay fish book.

9. What was your biggest failure?

My answer is the same as last year's: College, college, college.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

The first one. Same old shit, really.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Well, I paid to get my industrial piercing back, and I think that was the most exciting.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Every single goddamn muser's.

And my mother's.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Clothes and food. Thank God I get most of my books for free.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Disney World. SCBWI. Christmas, like always, because I'm five. And when I knew the book deal for Zombie Tag was coming but it still took a few more days to actually get it...that was torture.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

When I Was a Boy by Dar Williams

17. Compared to this time last year, you are:
Happier?

no

Richer?

yes

Thinner?

yes

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Reading. Last year, I said my goal was 50 books in 2010. I clocked in at 28. Guh.


19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Freaking the fuck out.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

I quote myself from last year: "Christmas is done, saun." I had an amazing Christmas at home with my family. We watched movies and made whoopie pies and played board games.

22. Did you fall in love in 2010?

I did not.

24. What was your favorite TV program?

Queer as Folk is still my favorite, but How I Met Your Mother emerged as a new contender. I love, love, love sitcoms.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I wish my answer were the same as last year's. "Nah, I don't have time for that shit."

It will be soon.

26. What was the best book you read?

There are a few that need mentioning.

REAL LIVE BOYFRIENDS by E. Lockhart
WHEN YOU REACH ME by Rebecca Stead
THE DISREPUTABLE HISTORY OF FRANKIE LANDAU-BANKS by E. Lockhart (um, I love her.)
BEAUTIFUL by Amy Reed
THE DEATHDAY LETTER by Shaun David Hutchinson
HER AND ME AND YOU by Lauren Strasnick

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Dar Williams

30. What was your favorite film of this year?

How to Train Your Dragon

31. What did you do on your birthday. And how old were you?

Nineteen. I remember my roommate put play-doh on every stair down from my room. And I honestly don't remember much else. I'm old. I got mocked on twitter for being old, I remember that.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I honestly don't know. Maybe knowing would have made it more satisfying.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Scrubby, in general, but I started wearing a lot of jewelry.

34. What kept you sane?

The Musers. Same answer as last year. But also my mother.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Is Noel from the Ruby Oliver books a public figure? Let's say yes.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

DADT

37. Whom did you miss?

I miss high school. And I sometimes miss who we used to be.

Hiatus

In case you hadn't noticed, this blog has been, and will continue to be on, for at least another week, a little hiatus while I get my life together.

In the meantime, you should read my letter to my 15 year old self here.

See you guys later!

Without Further Ado

Influences

For each book, I'm usually inspired by two specific things, often ones that have nothing to do with each other. And then my brain mashes them up and makes an idea.

BREAK: Fight Club and Into the Wild, first the movies, then the books.

INVINCIBLE SUMMER: A book of essays by Camus and The Hotel New Hampshire.

THE ANIMALS WERE GONE: Love Is The Higher Law and the 2002 Metro sniper shootings.

ZOMBIE TAG: How To Train Your Dragon (movie) and this comic.

FISHBOY: Peter Pan and Choke (the books).

For me, the experience of going to the movies always triggers something. There's something about sitting in the theater and just getting assaulted by someone else's ideas. Something, even something tiny, always hits me.

What are your inspirations?

Because I'm Me

And if I didn't start a new book every week, I wouldn't be me!

So here's a bit from the middle of a brand new book.

--

Mom sits at the table with me and beats eggs. She has the baby monitor pressed against her ear for Dylan's nap, like she's trying to use it to make a phone call.

I tell her, “I saw Fiona today.”

Mom shoves her hair off her forehead. “What are you paying attention to her for?”

Fiona is a ragged woman who lives at the end of the island. She tells fortunes.

“She was telling me this story about the ghosts who haunts this island. Not even just Mrs. Delaney. It's the whole island.”

Mom says, “Really, Rudy,” in this voice like she hasn't slept for days. Maybe she hasn't.

All the more reason she needs a good story. “It's a ghost of this boy they threw into the ocean, and he drowned.”

She looks up. “Why would you say something like that?”

“It's not my story, Mom, God.” Never mind.

Her eggs are all the same color now, but she doesn't stop beating them. Her whisk keeps tapping against the bottom of the bowl. I have this thought that she's going to keep going forever, like a wind-up toy that never winds down. Like her whole purpose in life is to beat these eggs.

Before Dylan was born, I never would have thought my Mom was the kind of person who could handle a sick kid. She'd cry that she was a horrible mother if I ever got a scrape. I always felt like I needed to keep her safe. Even when I was a kid. Dad would give me these talks about how we needed to protect her, and I would feel like a knight.

Now she's made entirely of steel, and Dad's the one who cries every time any little thing is wrong. He thinks every cough from Dylan or bad grade from me is going to be the breaking point, that we're just going to crumble in on ourselves at any minute.

The house creaks in the wind.

“Your father wants to take you fishing,” Mom says.

I wonder how hard dad would cry if he dipped his fishing line in the ocean and pulled out a boy.

Or a ghost.

Maybe he was a ghost.

I should have touched him. I missed my chance to find out what he was.

I can't believe I've turned into the kind of guy who wonders if people are ghosts. I guess that's what this place does to you.

A ghost is as good a guess as any for what he is, I suppose.

And now my father is trying to schedule time to be with me, acting like Mom is his secretary, and that feels even more unbelievable than a ghost.

We used to play ping pong in the backyard.

The ancient clock on the wall clicks with every second, but the hands are so springy that every click has two tones.

I'm trying to drink water, but all I taste is salt.

Mom gets up and goes to the stove. I say, “Mermaids can breathe underwater, right?”

She doesn't look at me. “Rudy, can't you do your homework?” She presses the monitor harder against her head.

“Can you look at me for a second?”

She turns around and does, of course. She has this soft expression in her eyes like I'm her baby. I'd forgotten that she still looks at me like that.

The fisherman was touching him, I realize. He couldn't have been a ghost. The fisherman had his hands all over him, kissing him, trying to...

“How do you have sex with a mermaid?” I say.

“Rudy, honestly.”

“Okay, sorry, God,” but I don't know if she even hears me, because she's holding that monitor like she wants it to be a part of her skull.

If I Owe You Something

I'M SORRY I'M SO BEHIND PLEASE DON'T HURT ME

Guest Post!

I did a guess post at the FABULOUS Kathleen Ortiz's blog about what to do when you get an offer from an agent. Check it out here.

I'm ooooooold

so very oooooooold

I know I know I know

I've been hiding from this blog. It's been a crazy few weeks. BUT SOON I'M GOING TO VLOG FOR YOU.

ASK ME ANYTHING

I decided this is going to be a monthly feature, for when I get sick of listening to myself talk. SO. I'll keep the comments open over the weekend, and you can ask me ANYTHING ANYTHING AT ALL and I promise to answer honestly.

Writing-related, not writing-related, serious, funny, hard, easy, ANYTHING AT ALL AAHHHHH GO GO GO

Housekeeping

I kind of hate the way this blog looks, so I'll be making it pretty today. Sorry if it gets all crazy messed up during transition. And let me know what you think of the new look...

Here's How It Really Went Down

I got off the phone with Suzie, and she was so sweet and lovely and we really clicked (butterfly swimmers ftw.)

Did I mention she was really sweet?

Did I mention I'm an abrasive Jew?

I emailed Brendan one sentence--"can I say 'fuck' to her???"

He replied--"fuck yes!"

So that's really how I knew everything was going to be okay.

There's a Real Post Coming

and it will be the hundredth post on this blog.

So I wanted to get rid of 99 right now, because the next post is important, and I like the metaphorical significance.

So. Happy post 99. I'll see you tomorrow.

Thanks for reading, and thanks for sticking with me. And thanks, always and forever, for giving a shit.

<3 hannah

kittens!

Jack Bandit:







Lieutenant Surge:

I'm a Little Late, But...

End of the year wrap-up survey, just in case people want more HANNAH MOSKOWITZ THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD stuff and less HANNAH MOSKOWITZ THE WRITER STUFF. But there will still be writing stuff in here. Promise.

1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?

Saw my book on bookshelves. Went to college. Got within a few feet of a lamb. Did a long-distance relationship. Moved away from home. Made a life-changing decision to change colleges. Learned how to comfort myself, by myself. Discovered some fantastic music. (I hate the word "discovered" when it comes to music. It's not like I unearthed this shit.) Got an agent who I don't know how I lived without. Sold two more books. Wrote my first adult book. Wrote three YA books.

2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don't think I had any for 2009. I made a few for 2010 that I hope to keep.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Not very close.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No. But my grandfather died somewhere between New Years Day, 2008, and the day after, so New Years always makes me think of him.

5. What countries did you visit?

England for a week, but that's it...and the Bahamas, but come on.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

A fulfilling college experience. An adult life. My own cats. My boyfriend closer to me. Uh...moar book deals?

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
August 25th. BREAK's release :)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

BREAK's release. Selling two more books (have you heard these things enough already?) Being proactive when college sucked. Finding an agent who worked better for me.

9. What was your biggest failure?

College, college, college.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nope, not even swine flu. And I didn't even sprain my ankle in 2009, which might be my first year ever not doing it. Maybe Jonah and Jesse suffered enough illness and injury in my stead?

11. What was the best thing you bought?

My netbook is pretty fabulous. And my house, but that's renting (please, I can't buy a house.)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My best friend Emma, for a year's anniversary of being incredibly strong.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Clothes. Food. Handbags...extremely lucky for me, my parents pay for college.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

BookdealsandBREAKrelease. Oh, and seeing RENT with Grace was incredible. All three times.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

When My Boy Walks Down the Street by The Magnetic Fields.

17. Compared to this time last year, you are:
Happier?

Oh, a million times happier.

Richer?

Indeed!

Thinner?

Indeed!

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

READING. I did not read nearly enough in 2009. Huge problem. My goal is 50 books in 2009, which I know is NOT a lot for some of you, but it'll be so much better than I did in 2009.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

College...

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

Christmas is done, saun. But I spent it at home, with my family and the boyfriend, then seeing Sherlock Holmes.

22. Did you fall in love in 2009?

I think that yes, I did.

24. What was your favorite TV program?

Queer as Folk. heh.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

Nah, I don't have time for that shit.

26. What was the best book you read?

Oooh. Like I said, I didn't read nearly enough. But definitely WILL GRAYSON, WILL GRAYSON by David Levithan and John Green. Incredible.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Getting heavy into Margot and the Nuclear So and So's, definitely.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?

Fantastic Mr. Fox, definitely.

31. What did you do on your birthday. And how old were you?

I'm eighteen. And for my birthday my friends and I went out for Fondue, like every year. We played SAY ANYTHING and ran around with a bubble wand, as well. And we watched RENT, and we measured our lives in love, etc.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Christopher not going away.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Laziness. I used to spend a shitload of time on clothes, and now I'm very lazy. But I did start wearing heels, though not on a regular basis.

34. What kept you sane?

The Musers.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Mmm. Huh. I really don't know.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

Gay marriage in D.C.

37. Whom did you miss?

The stupid boyfriend in Ohio.

Teaser Saturday

We should get my name out of the way first. It's Body Count Beatrice.

I mean, really it's Beatrice Tanerbaum, but the Disco Dykes always were fond of alliteration. I've been Body Count Beatrice ever since Kiley, who was girl number two. Kiley was the accident. That's how I think of her in my head. Elizabeth was the tragic. Kiley was the accident. Lea was the mistake.

When the Dykes came up with the name, after Kiley, in September, it was joking, gentle, to make me feel better. You silly girl, can't you see it's a coincidence? You're a voodoo princess, they'd say, rolling their eyes, mocking me. Body Count Beatrice, two isn't so impressive.

After Lea, in January, no one said it, everyone pretended the name had never existed, because that rule they teach you in acting class, about how things are funny when they happen three times? It doesn't count when your girlfriends are dying.

And then in April, I started dating Benji, and the few people who hadn't been avoiding me because I carried death on my fingers suddenly were, and “Body Count Beatrice,” they whispered in my ear while they pushed me into my locker, “How long are you going to give the boy?”

Puppy!

Here's a shitty picture of my new puppy. His name is Shepherd and I love him.

I'M ALIVE

And I am going to be a better blogger in 2010. I SWEAR.

I have nothing important to say to you today at all. Can this not count as 2010 blogging? It's 4 in the morning. I think I should be exempt from making sense at this hour.

If I'm smart, I'll delete this post right now. But I wanted you to all know I haven't abandoned you. (And if you sent me a query, I will read it. Really. At some point. I swear.)

Working up to a move on January 13th. Very excited. And I'm getting kittens on the 15th. There will be pictures.

BUT. First, a challenge.

NAME MY KITTENS.

They are nearly identical, two light gray tabbies, both boys.

I'll think of some reward if I end up using your names. It will probably be a fairly nice reward. Aaaaaaand go.

hola

Sorry for abandoning you guys over the holidays. Hope you had a lovely time.

Sorry also for those of you who have emailed me and are still waiting for a response. I will write back, I promise.

I've starting working on a new project--not a book--and I'm having a good time with it. You can follow me on twitter if you want to track my crashing-and-burning process, because essentially I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.

Anyone have anything exciting happening in the New Year? I have a book going out on submission in a few weeks (hopefully!) I'm psyched.

How to Contact Me

Do it!

You don't need a good reason or something. I'm not famous. Really. Right now I'm sitting on the couch in my jammies watching some a capella thing my mom TiVod for me (fuck yeah I'm on winter break.) Also, I'm watching the snowpacalypse outside my room (do you know what's going on in Washington D.C. right now? holy mother of...I mean come on now).


So basically, I'm doing exactly what any chick is doing in D.C. right now, I'm just telling you about it because I HAVE A BLOG.

Anyway.

The fact that I have a blog with which to rant about my exceedingly normal life and a few books in which I construct lives that are remarkably less normal than my own doesn't make me famous, and it definitely doesn't make me hard to contact. Here's how to get in touch with me!

Email's probably the easiest way to reach me. I'll get back to you uber-quick because I'm a loser like that. If you ask me to read a query letter, that might take a little longer (I have a few upstanding query letters in my inbox--I will get to you, guys!) because I need to set aside time to read and think about them, and clearly I'm too busy ranting about my life on the internet. My email address is until.hannah@gmail.com

If you something quick to say, Twitter is great. I always tweet back! @hannahmosk

Facebook is cool too. I have two pages on facebook--a fan page and a personal page. I obviously maintain both of them. You can totally friend my real page, just leave me a note mentioning you read the blog so I don't sit here wondering how the fuck I know you.

You may find me on myspace (I can't even remember) but I'm not really there. I don't even know the passwords. IT'S ALL LIES.

So you can can get in touch with me for any reason, seriously. If you have a suggestion for the blog, I'd love to hear it, or if you have any kind of question I can answer. I'd love to try to help. You can send me your query letters, but it does sometimes take me a little while.

Here are a few other guidelines:

--Right now, I can't read your manuscript for you, even a little bit, sorry, unless we have a previous arrangement. And synopses kill my brain, and it's distinctly possible I might ignore your email out of fear.

--If I don't answer you, try again. Sometimes I'm stupid and don't see shit.

--I have this complete inability to write long emails except in very strange circumstances. Please don't be offended if you write me a few paragraphs and I answer with a few sentences. Rest assured, I feel awkward enough.

--Call me hannah. Seriously. You can capitalize the first h if you want, that's chill. Don't call me Ms. Moskowitz. I'm like an infant.