Friday, July 24, 2009

1 Month CONTEST!

In a few hours, it will officially be 1 month until BREAK.

I can't believe this is happening.

In honor of this momentous occasion, I want to hear any funny injury stories you have. Bonus if it involves a broken bone, but it's fine if not--I've never broken any bones myself, so I'm sympathetic if you don't have a story to share...

Give me your stories, I'll choose my favorite and the winner gets to name a character in the next chapter of ATWF. Male or female, doesn't matter. I need some names!


Unknown said...

Oh god, I've got a great one. It was the summer before fourth grade.

My mom, my brother and I were at my brother's friend Jeff's house to hang out or something, I don't know. We were outside in his little cul-de-sac and I had my roller blades on. Naturally, being unconcerned for my safety, I wasn't wearing kind of protection, be it knee, head, crotch, etc. I was skating along and spotted something on the ground I wanted to investigate, so I bent my knees and crouched down, going super super slowly, until I rolled up to the thing. Of course, I can't slow down (not that skilled) so my right blade rolled right over it (a little rock), I lose my balance, and I go flying backwards. I put my hands out to catch myself... bad idea, apparently.

Fell back on my hand so hard, right wrist fractured in two places (both bones) and a chunk taken out of another bone. I ran into the house and they took me to the navy hospital where they gave me these enormous pain pills. Since the bones had shifted out of place after the break, they had to set the bones before they casted it and everything. So, they suspended my fingers from this thing like a squid made of Chinese finger traps and it took a couple of (so they tell me) big, burly military doctors pulling straight down on my upper arm before the wrist bones finally dislodged from themselves in order to be set properly.

My family has a ton of stories about me trying to perform everyday activities with a cast.... Try eating corn on the cob with your elbow locked in a 90ยบ angle. Here's a hint, it doesn't work!

althrasher said...

We had a swingset in the backyard when I was a little under two. My four-year-old brother decided to climb the ladder at the same time as me. Guess who won? Oh, and guess who ended up with a broken leg for her second birthday?

My parents claim that at one point the cast fell on my head, but I have no memory of that. So it didn't happen.

Ashe said...

I've got one! No broken bones though but it's funny none the less!

It was nearing the end of winter, and I was in public school it was warm enough to not have on our gloves and hats and scarves but there was still some snow on the ground and the ground was beginning to thaw where there was no snow. It was recess and we had these blue bars with rings on it, the kind you swing on to get to the other or hold on to two of them and do a flip.

Well I liked spinning while holding on to one of the rings, I could go really, really fast if I was just on my toes and shifted my weight just slightly until I got spinning. Well I took off my mittens to do this, and the metal was slippery.

Well I'm betting you can foresee what happens next. The structure was held up by four metal posts one on each corner. And as I spun getting faster and faster and laughing my head off like an insane maniac my hands slipped off the ring and I went head first into the corner of the square corner metal pole. I ended up flat on my back laughing so hard, I didn't know I had cracked my head open until I lifted my hand from my forehead.

So there you have it, I spun into a pole and broke my head (well not really but kinda). But I can proudly say that I have a very hard head and I dented that pole!

I don't remember much of the day before I hit my head though...

Martha Flynn said...

My two older brothers took martial arts but I was forbidden because I'm a GIRL. brothers would show me moves on the sly and we'd practice them.

One day, my good friend, a swimmer, tapped me on the shoulder surprising me and I wrapped my arm around her elbow and twisted her arm out of its socket - not realizing that my brothers had never taken the movement to its full potential and I, in the heat of the moment, didn't know how to hold back.

Yeah....I felt like a douche and she had to sit out swimming and had her arm in a sling.

Holly said...

I have one story that involves two stupid injuries.

One summer, my dad decided that he knew how to skateboard, so he jumped on my brother's skateboard and tried to negotiate the half pipe in our backyard. Of course he fell and popped his shoulder out of the socket and had to go to the hospital and have his arm put in a sling.

A few days later, my car had a flat tire. My father couldn't fix it due to the aforementioned sling, so he had to talk me through it. When we got to the part where I had to take the lug nuts off, I couldn't loosen them, so my dad told me to stomp on the lug wrench. I was wearing flip flops. So instead of stomping directly on the wrench with the bottom of my foot, I somehow hit it at an angle and jammed the pointy end of the wrench into the side of my foot. The pain was unbelieveable. I tried to walk it off and insist that I was fine, but then my mom noticed blood pouring onto the ground. She took me to the hospital where I had to get nine stitches. The nurse told me I shouldn't be changing tires until I was old enough to drive a car, which offended me because I was 18 at the time. When we got home from the hospital, my dad had ordered pizza for dinner because he couldn't make spaghetti with one arm.

My brother (who was not old enough to drive) fixed my tire without incident and I never did finish learning how to change a tire.

Sarah Heacox said...

I was on a kayaking trip with my friend's family. Her little brother fell out of his boat and swam it to shore. I was laughing at him, so I flipped MY kayak. While swimming to the surface my foot hit a rock with a horrible cracking noise. At that point I knew it was broken. But I was cracking up because the situation was ridiculous. I swam MY boat to shore.

I was laughing, but I called out to my friend, "I broke my foot!" She was whooping with laughter and gasping for breath. She ALREADY had the camera out to take pictures of us. I tried to stand up to help her little brother drain the water from his boat, but I fell right over because of the pain. There is a series of ten photos of me in various stages of giggling, falling over, writhing in pain, and pointing at my sad broken foot.

For additional hilarity, her family stopped for ice cream and later stopped for dinner at an indian casino. I had to hop around the whole time with my arm over her shoulders (and she's 8 inches taller than me). Five hours later, we got to the hospital.

For bonus comedy, the radiologist misread my x-ray, and told me there was no break. Two weeks of hiking, tae kwon do, and backpacking later, I'd turned a small hairline fracture into a massive spiral fracture all the way around the bone.

I had a big month-long backpacking trip coming up just six weeks away, so the doctor gave me a device called a 'bone stimulator', which all my friends enjoyed making dirty jokes about. I had to carry around a battery-powered thing attached by wires to electrodes on my foot. The electric current stimulated the bone to heal faster.

Unknown said...

When I was little, my sister and I had these toys. You sat on them, really low to the ground, and moved the handle back and forth and it moved you forward... slowly. I think they were called Roller Racers. Meggo and her friends would instead, put their knees on the seat and propel themselves forward with their feet, like crouching on a skateboard with handlebars, I guess. I refused to do it the wrong way.

So mine broke, and one day dad was grilling in the backyard and Meggo and I were playing, and I asked if she would let me use hers. She said sure... as long as I did it her way. So I did and as I was scooting along, it hit a rock. I went flying face first into the concrete and split open my chin.

iono said...

Ooh, fun...

A few summers back, my family was all set with our summer plans -- my little sister and my dad were going to go to Russia to visit my grandparents, and my older sister, my mom, and I were going to take a road trip to the east coast to visit my uncle.

Three days before the flight, my sisters and a friend and I were having a pillowfight in our living room. My younger sister jumped up, landed on her foot wrong, and broke it. On completely flat, carpeted floor. My grandparents got to see her for the first time in years with an enormous cast on her foot.

Two days later, I was walking up the stairs. I've lived with stairs for pretty much my entire life. Halfway up the staircase, I neglected to lift my foot high enough, accidentally slammed it into the step, and broke my toe. My mother had to take me into the emergency room, two days after she'd taken my sister in.

Race said...

Um... when I was little I pushed my older brother off a picnic table and broke his arm. Funny? Or just awesome?

Ami The Salami said...

Well, I don't have a very long explanation of what happened because it was years ago and it's all sort of fuzzy now. Okay, so one day my grandparents got my little brother and I two of those things that you sit on and bounce. I have no idea what they're called, though. Anyway, my little brother and I were bouncing around the house and I decided to be a little which and push my brother. He hit his head on the table and started crying my parent's had him lay in their bed. I, being such a caring sister, stayed next to him the whole time, standing on the bouncy-thing. Basically... I slipped, hit my head on the edge of something, and cracked my head. My older brother, my mom, my dad, and my little brother took me to the doctor. When we got out of the car, my older brother told me to tie my shoes. Being the smart ass I am, I told him to shut up. And then I tripped on my shoe lace and hit my head. Again.

Then, a few years later, I don't even know what happened. I just remember cracking my head open - again - and being rushed to the hospital. I stayed up until three in the morning because of that (which is rather late for a fourth grader) and was woken at six in the morning because one of my friend's wanted to know if I wanted to come over. At six in the morning.

Okay... maybe I do have a long explanation? :P Anyway, congrats on your book! I'll read it when it comes out :)

Anonymous said...

A few years ago, my family and I went to the beach in North Carolina. Dad and I were boogie boarding, and I saw a beautifully huge wave rolling in toward shore. I knew I was too close to catch it, but I tried anyway. The wave crashed over my head and slammed me, face-first, into the sand. My braces went through my lip, and for the rest of our vacation my face looked like hamburger meat.

Emilia Plater said...

Let me tell you this. I was huge cat torturer when I was little. There were two and I'd squish them with rugs, try to push them off the stairs, etc etc. Well, on one Halloween night I was bugging the older cat on my parent's bed. He was trying to sleep and I kept poking him in the stomach. Finally I bent down to stare at his face and he took the opportunity to CLAW my EYELID. I started screaming. My parents freaked out and they both rushed me to the emergency room. Halfway there I was feeling okay, it wasn't actually bleeding, but I kept crying because I was a kid and that's what you do. At the emergency room the nurse used this antiseptic stuff that was dyed orange for Halloween. So the next day I had an orange eyeball.

And I grew up to be a huge cat lover. :D

ryan.gebhart said...

So when I was a wee little sprog, like four years old, my brother Brad (age six at the time) climbed up a tree, fell and broke his arm. My mom took Brad and me to the hospital, and when he comes out of the hospital room, he's got a cast and two Dum-Dum suckers. The doctor gives me one sucker.

I go, why can't I have two suckers? I want two.

My mom tells me that because Brad broke his arm, he gets two. Obviously, I did not see the justice in this, and I get pissed. I proceed to climb atop the bench in the lobby, hopping up and down and screaming "I want another sucker!" and bawling angrily.

When I slipped, I fell right on my face, splitting my chin wide open and knocking me unconscious.

My mom had to tell me what happened afterwards, cos I have no recollection. She tells me that the doctors had to tie me down in a papoose because blood is shooting out of my face and I'm screaming like a psychopath.

So, anyway, they stitch my chin up, and my mom was so upset and pissed that I was such a brat, that I never got my second sucker.

Moral of the story: Dum-Dums rule.

Anonymous said...

Oops, I put my entry in the comments by mistake. Sorry!

Anonymous said...

OK, this is a bit late so nevermind the reward, but I think you might appreciate this.
When I was 15 or 16 our neighbor across the street put up a basketball backboard. So 3 of us started playing a game and I, who had never played basketball besides some games of Horse in camp, jumped up to try to get the ball. I didn't know better and had all my fingers straight. I was compensating for my inability to jump but making my hand longer. So.... of course my finger jammed the ball. Ouch! ouch! OUCH! My middle right finger swoll up really nicely, so off to the the hospital we go. The X-ray showed a bone chip off the 2nd joint. I got one of those large wrap around finger splints with foam you must not get wet - which I of course did by the 2nd week and it stank for the rest of the 6 weeks I had to have it on.
When the finger splint came off I headed across the street, got into a scrabble for the basketball and.... of course..... Other hand, fourth finger. This time a hairline fracture. This time I knew NOT to get the foam in the splint wet. Showering with a plastic bread bag over your hand sucks.
So..... over half of the summer is gone now but when the splint comes off I head out across the street .... Yup. The right hand, fourth finger. Hairline, but at least it was very small. For some reason that splint did not stay on the full 6 weeks. I think I got it wet in the 4th week and simply took it off, then just was careful for another 1.5 weeks.
When the finger felt good I headed across the street but declined to join the basketball game.... we played Horse. Then I decided to try the neighbor's skate board. Yes, I fell on my ass, got up, and went home to have my mom take me to the doctor. Luckily it was not my tail bone but my right hand middle finger again, but the bone must have been stronger because it was not a bone break but something in the second joint that had it hurting more than a break and really swollen. This time the splint did not go all the way around the finger but was just a single piece of metal under the finger which was taped solidly to it for the first month of school.

So 3 broken fingers, though each was only a chip, and a broken or significantly damaged joint. All in one summer, all in a row.